Matthew 7:6 (KJV)
“Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you.”
If someone can walk away from you, let them go. God closed the door for a reason, whether it was your fault or theirs, it doesn’t matter. Stay focused on God and the lesson He is trying to teach you through all of this. Never isolate yourself. There is safety in numbers. Surround yourself with people who love and care about you, people who will not judge you or rush you through the healing process, because a wounded heart needs time to heal, and everyone heals differently. If you don’t have any support, get counseling, join a group, exercise, and cry and scream it out. Cry some more. Turn on some music. Turn it up loud! And then pour all of your love and attention into getting healthy again. What Satan meant for evil will turn around for your good in time. God will turn your situation around where you will be so glad that the person did leave, if they were not right for you.
If it is someone who’s passed away, know that God understands the anger, anguish, and extreme loneliness that accompany this type of loss and He is there to provide the comfort you need to carry you through the storm. While we may not understand why he allows such tragedies, we have to trust in His will. Cherish the great moments you’ve shared with this person and celebrate the love you had in the time allowed. There are so many that have deeply desired this type of relationship all of their lives, yet tragically never discover it.
This kind of special love is truly unmatched, and a gift from above, so be grateful for the times you shared together knowing that it’s only the end of the physical relationship, yet their beautiful spirit continues on. In time, if God is opening up another door with someone he can trust with your fragile heart, by all means pray about it first, and proceed forward.
Don’t Obsess over the Person but Focus on God Instead
Find ways to distract yourself from thinking or obsessing about the person.
Now is the time to love yourself like never before. Ask God for strength to get out of bed, to shower, brush your teeth, to pamper yourself, to go and lift those weights, to reach out to others who are hurting. The enemy of our soul takes full advantage when were down.
Satan utilizes these painful moments to fill our minds with lies when were most vulnerable, and his goal is simply to tempt us towards depression and discouragement while watching us fall into a downward spiral of despair. Focus on God brings relief. In time, you will start to feel better. I know you may not want to hear this right now because you’re in so much pain, but, you cannot rush the grief process. You must go through it and not around it. If the relationship is meant to be it will happen naturally without any struggle on your part. Caution: Sometimes the only thing that changes is time…not the person who hurt you. Seek God when it comes to restoration.
The best revenge is success, and the next time that person sees you, they will not see a battered broken down soul begging them to come back. They will see a beautiful healthy, powerful, courageous, woman/man of God thriving like never before. When God removes someone, it only means he has someone better for you. Every heartbreak disappointment and rejection only leads you one step closer to who you were destined to be with.
God will bring the sunshine back into your life again, but you have to hang in there, trust him, worship Him like never before, and thank Him for sending the right person who will sweep you off of your feet. You are beautiful. You are loved. You are worthy. Believe it!
PSALMS 34:18 “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” God’s strength is made perfect in your weakness. God will never turn away from you when you’re hurting, despite what your pain is telling you. God has a perfect plan for your life. No matter how much it hurts, cling to Him. You will be happy you did once the emotional storm clouds clear. And, they will clear. The sooner you stop beating yourself up about it, the sooner you will recover. If they couldn’t appreciate you, it’s their loss and someone better will come along. God has so much more in store for you than what this person could have offered. Trust that… no matter how old you are.
God is watching over you at your weakest darkest moment, especially when you don’t feel His presence. He is always there. During this vulnerable time Satan will use people to reject you, use your own insecurities, and use other circumstances to try and convince you that you are worthless and unlovable, what happened was your fault, and that no one will ever love you again. Painful memories that simulate the break up will resurface and memories of trauma that have remained unresolved since early childhood years will re-emerge adding more salt to the wound. All the while Satan’s minions are screaming that it’s over for you, you are not good enough, not smart enough, not pretty enough, not perfect enough, not rich enough, and things will never get better, and for you to just throw in the towel and give up. The loss of a relationship is like death. It is a great and tremendous end of something that at one time made you feel alive, accepted, and cherished.
“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”
Our Heavenly Father has the authority to remove all anger, bitterness, pain, and suffering. He has the power to change your situation. Allow God to remove your pain through prayer, worship and having faith that He and He alone can do it. It takes time to feel the energy to move forward without him/her, but in time, you will begin to feel God’s comfort and see His perspective on why the relationship ended. Trust that God knows exactly what is best for you and who is best for you. Remember, whatever you focus on the most will become more powerful. An end of a relationship can either break you into pieces or it can build you up and make you stronger than ever, and more prepared for the beautiful relationship that is yet to come.