Rev. Dr. Fred Deegbe, the former General Secretary of the Christian Council of Ghana and the Senior Pastor of Calvary Baptist Church has said that marriage is work in itself and is more difficult than getting an MBA. In fact it is as difficult as training a lion to make it look like a domestic cat.
Gospelcrusader.com, in an exclusive interview, sought Rev Dr Deegbe’s opinion on the high rate of divorce in the church today. He said, “People are marrying for the wrong reasons; people get married because it is socially prestigious to do so. I believe most of these divorces are amongst the so-called middle class educated people. People have a very short fuse. Traditionally, they say a woman’s place is in the kitchen but now the woman is the office and may even have a better job than the man. ”
He expressed further concern that ” People’s tolerance level have been reduced because they are a little independent now. The men too, sometimes, don’t show any serious level of commitment. So mainly it’s immaturity, lack of patience, want-to-get-there quick and I dare to say, ignorance. If we are aware of the devastation of victims of divorce particularly the children, we won’t do it. ”
” I believe divorce is a scandal that the church of Ghana must look at. And we in Calvary Baptist have taken a very serious look at marriage counseling. It doesn’t solve every problem but people must be aware of what they are getting into. Some of the grounds on which the young couples want to divorce is a joke to some of the old married couples. They need to receive counsel from their elders who are married since there is nothing new under the sun.
Rev. Dr. Fred Deegbe finally cautioned those who intend to marry with a quote by Walter Trobisch which goes like “If you want to be happy don’t marry, if you want to make someone happy, marry.” He went on to explain that if you take a mentality of selfishness, childishness, lack of effort, and such like those,you would come out of marriage quickly. But if you want to make someone else happy, u would have to compromise, make sacrifices, grow, love and understand each other. People who do these, would make it in marriage.