Men Are Tempted To Lust – Women Are Tempted To Be Lusted After

Adultery definition
Though it would be simpler to place the lust problem in the lap of one gender, it would bring harm to God’s Word because lust is every person’s temptation.
For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life. – Galatians 6:7-8 (ESV)
Sexual Sin Is A Two way street
It takes two people to engage in sexual immorality. Lets take he case of porn. The guy who is seeking a sexual object to satisfy his lusts and a woman who wants to be the object of his lusts. Remove either participant, and porn would struggle to survive.
Typically when people think about porn they quickly jump to the perverted guy problem, which is only half of the equation, and why the wife of a porn addict wrote to me. She made a strong and compelling appeal to me to talk about the other side of the porn problem–the gaze capturers.
Before I proceed, may I ask you a question: When I say “porn” or “pornography” what comes to your mind? When a woman was asked this question, she said, “naked women.” Her response was interesting to me.
She did not jump to the perverted guy problem, but talked about women with no clothes on. What she conveyed is the other misunderstanding about the porn problem, which is the ladies of porn found on the Internet, adult movies, and porn magazines.
Thinking that porn is only
(1) a perverted guy problem or
(2) a ladies of porn problem not only narrows the interpretation of porn to something that misses a vital detail, but it reduces the Bible’s impact on the real problem.
To understand the real problem, you have to go deeper than the outward manifestation of the problem. This is how we address all our problems; we begin in the heart before we address the behavior, which is why the Bible starts at the root of porn rather than the fruit.
I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. – Matthew 5:28 (ESV)
You cannot get into porn without first lusting. Porn participation is the overflow of lust-filled hearts. This not only broadens the pandemic scope of porn, but it’s an alarming warning to women everywhere: millions of husbands, fathers, brothers, and leaders are tempted to lust though they may never look at porn.
Each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire (lust). Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin (porn), and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death (relational dysfunction). – James 1:14-15 (ESV)
A lady in a church building on Sunday morning is better than her being on the set of a X-rated production, but her church building is not impervious to the encroachments of lust. And her role in our universal battle against the encroachments of lust is just as essential in the sanctuary as it is at her swimming pool.
Any woman is a potential lust magnet that can attract a guy because this kind of temptation is not isolated to the Internet. And unlike the alcoholic who can take another route to work rather than driving by the liquor store each morning, lust is harder to escape.
After you re-frame the conversation from the behavioral problem that it is, you will be able to perceive how much bigger it is, while being able to fortify yourself in the fight.
Are you a gaze capturer?
 Men Are Tempted To Lust – Women Are Tempted To Be Lusted After
Without dismissing the man’s temptation to lust or removing all the responsibility he deserves when he acts out on that temptation, it is just as important to give adequate time to the other side of this problem: Women enjoy being observed and they hope to be captured.
God put an attraction gene in both the male and female. In Genesis 1 and 2 the concept of looking at a girl and being liked by a guy was God’s design. Adam was the pursuer and Eve was pursued. And it was good.
Then the man and the woman fell down in the garden.
Adam’s eyes were opened in ways he could never have imagined before. And Eve walked in her own kind of darkness. They both enjoyed their unique versions of lust.
1. Adam wanted Eve for self-serving purposes.
2. Eve wanted to be pursued for self-serving purposes.
This is why women are easily tempted to seduce or manipulate a man. For some women it is because they enjoy the tantalizing power they can exert over a guy. I’m sure this is not an odd thought to you, especially if you contextualize that desire within the feminist’s movement.
The feminist–like Eve–hate the role of submission, thus they rebelled too. Do you believe this temptation to manipulate or gain power is exclusive to the feminist’s lobby?
There are millions of women who love God, but they can be tempted by the sin of manipulating the opinions of others by how they present themselves to others. These women are gaze capturers.
1. Are you a gaze capturer?
2. Do you secretly enjoy the power (perverse security) you feel when people notice you?
3. Do you secretly enjoy the ability to control (perverse security) others by your beauty?